More than Just a Crime Novel!

In this novel, the author explores choices and their consequences. From the time Lavender chooses to leave home at 16 to live with an older man on a remote farm, the consequences reverberate over decades, ultimately ending on Death Row.
The author imagines alternate lives for all the characters, including the victims and the perpetrator ( which is his only show of remorse).
It's also great crime novel, which features a strong female lead, interesting details about the justice system and foster care, without being preachy. ( )

Listened to this on audio. This was a very interesting take on the crime thriller. We already know who did it, he's on death row for killing several young girls back in the day. Today is is last day and we watch the him has he goes thru his day on his way to the execution chamber. Intercut with this we go back in time to meet the women in his life, those who raised him, those he killed and those who caught him. What's absent, to good effect, is all the violence of the actual crimes. We know he did it, we don't have to "see" it, we just get to meet and understand the people around him. A good quick read. ( )

Just a great read from start to finish. An original voice, empathetic storytelling for every character, and a page-turning plot to keep it moving. ( )

worth the hype ( )

Gratuitous sex, animal cruelty ( )

Fantastic book. Finally someone has done something in the serial killer genre worth reading. This is one of this year’s Edgar nominees and the nomination is well deserved. The victims and their families have a voice.The serial killer himself is not presented as either an evil genius or a simplistic killing machine.The death penalty,foster system, good and evil and the fabric of society itself are all examined in this moving book ( )

Notes on an Execution is the gripping tale of the women whose lives have been impacted in some way by (or who have impacted the life of) serial killer Ansel Packer. His mother Lavender’s heartbreaking backstory gives the reader insight into Ansel’s early days and the poverty he believes led to his brother’s tragic death in infancy. Whether this has to do with what Ansel ultimately becomes is left for contemplation.

Ansel ends up in foster care where he meets Saffy, a fellow foster child with a healthy suspicion that there’s more to young Ansel than meets the eye. She later becomes the detective investigating the disappearances of three women she believes Ansel is connected to, including a woman from their shared childhood home.

As the story unfolds, there is a free Ansel and an imprisoned version about to be executed for his crimes. The author does a stellar job making clear that most things aren’t all bad or good and there is a lot of speculation of what Ansel might have become had he made different choices. His story is told in alternating viewpoints including a second-person POV (“you” perspective) that is a bit jarring but makes it clear when the reader is in present-day Ansel’s head.

Then there's Ansel's wife, Jenny, who the reader primarily learns about from her twin sister, and Ansel's niece Blue who sees him in differing lights. She knows what he’s done but that there’s good in him, too. Through her, Lavender finds redemption.

Notes on an Execution is a crime fiction standout for its willingness to explore the sweeping impact of a killer's choices. It reads like a love letter to the lost. A reminder in a true crime-obsessed culture that there are victims and families impacted every day by violence. Recommended for crime drama fans.
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3.5/4 - characters of the mother and twin sisters held promise in the beginning but as the story progressed onto the investigation everything got so cliche ( )

When a murder or series of murders take place, it's the murderer who gets immortalized in all their "glory". This story undoes that.
The layers and elements in this book tear it all down and present the pieces in their separate forms.
Nature vs. nurture: what happens to children in lives exposed to hate, valence and a lack of care? Ansel is a product of what happens when the system fails, and his baby brother.....
The foster system: potential exposure to children in the system and how they may turn out. Saffron is subject to this life after her mother dies and her father is an unknown party. She is exposed, transforms and grows into something she still struggles with towards nearly the very end of the book. Tragically beautiful.
Choices: a major part of the book is when a murderer takes no time at all to kill a person and not consider all the choices their taking away from that victim and anyone who may be linked to them.
The police system/law: its unjust and broken, in how it's run and how it sees it's players. Saffron is middle eastern and has never stepped foot outside of the USA.
I could go on, but if you're familiar with my reviews, I refuse to release spoilers.
This book is wonderfully different, well written and will have your attention the entire time. You feel the hate, the panic, the frustration....you feel, at least I hope you do because it's another major element. Enjoy ( )

I enjoyed the characters and their development, but some parts of the story seemed to be left hanging or go against previous events. ( )

“You are a fingerprint. When you open your eyes on the last day of your life, you see your own thumb. In the jaundiced prison light, the lines on the pad of your thumb look like a dried-out riverbed, like sand washed into twirling patterns by water, once there and now gone.”

Meet forty-six-year-old Ansel Packer, Inmate # 999631 in a Texas Prison, twelve hours away from execution for the murder of three teenage girls twenty-nine years ago. Dubbed 'The Girly Killer', he fancies himself a philosopher and is hopeful that his story and 'Theory', which he has documented in a stack of notebooks, will be published and revels in thinking of the fanfare that would follow.

Through multiple POVs and different timelines, the narrative follows Ansel’s life from his birth and early years on a farm till the moment he takes his final breath. We follow Ansel Packer in the present as he counts the hours leading to his execution. The larger part of the narrative describing Ansel’s past, his crimes, victims, and eventual capture is told through the POVs of three women. This is an exploration of his past and the impact his life and actions have had on the women in his periphery. We meet Ansel’s mother, Lavender, a teenager herself when he was born, who abandoned her two children to escape a stifling abusive relationship only to resurface years later at a commune in California. She never meets her son again, though she does get to know of his deeds and the fate that awaits him. She ponders her role in what Ansel has become and knows that the first four years of his life haunt both her and her son for the rest of their days.
“Lavender knew, then, that the world was a forgiving place. That every horror she had lived or caused could be balanced with such gutting kindness. It would be a tragedy, she thought—inhumane—if we were defined only by the things we left behind.”

The second person we hear from is Saffron (Saffy) Singh, who was once housed in the same group home in the foster care system as was Ansel and who had witnessed Ansel’s evil streak and his vindictiveness as a child. We meet her again as an adult climbing the ladder of law enforcement, progressing from Investigator to eventually Captain with the New York State Police. Her interest in the serial killer becomes personal when one of the victims turns out to be a childhood friend who was once housed with her and Ansel.
“Some men, Saffy knew, killed from a place of anger. Others killed from humiliation, or hatred, or depraved sexual need. Ansel was not rare or mystifying. He was the least nuanced of them all, a murky combination of all the above. A small and boring man who killed because he felt like it.”

The third POV is that of Hazel, his former sister-in-law who though once impressed by his charm, was not quite sure what to make of him but has long since seen his darker side and was instrumental in helping her sister Jenny to leave him and start afresh.
“There are millions of men out there who want to hurt women—people seem to think that Ansel Packer is extraordinary, because he actually did.”

“Ansel gets the glorified title of serial killer, a phrase that seems to inspire a bizarre, primitive lust. Books and documentaries and dark tunnels on the internet. Crowds of women captivated.”
The author is sharp in her criticism of the fascination that the general public, print and entertainment media express with serial killers . She places emphasis on the effect of his actions on the people he leaves behind and the aftermath of the crimes on the families- the victims’ and his own. The author gives a voice to the people who have played a role in Ansel's life - the same people whose lives have been irrevocably altered by their association with him and will be left dealing with their own feelings of hurt, grief and trauma long after Ansel is gone.
“Twenty years have passed since they found the bodies—twenty-nine since the girls went missing—and still, a news camera hovers at the edge of the vigil, determined to make a story. Saffy feels slimy, the truth prickling. There would be no story, for these girls alone. There would be no vigil, no attention at all. They are relevant because of Ansel and the fascination the world has for men like him.”

Dark, compelling and thought-provoking, with an interesting cast of characters, Danya Kukafka’s Notes on an Execution is an engaging, if not easy, read. The scenes depicting animal cruelty were difficult to take in. While I understand the need for Lavender's contributon to the narrative, I felt that Blue should have been given her own POV as she does play a significant role in the latter part of Ansel’s story. Having said that, it should be noted that this novel does not follow a standard serial killer thriller structure wherein we follow an investigator searching for the identity of an unknown serial killer. At the very onset of this novel it is established that we know the killer, we know he did it, we know he has been caught and we know he is on death row awaiting execution. So, what’s left to know? The answer: A lot.

“Good and evil are simply stories that we tell ourselves, narratives we’ve created to justify being alive. No person is wholly good, and no person is wholly evil. Everyone deserves the chance to keep living, don’t you think?” ( )

Exceptional, painful, and deeply human. A story of the women in a serial killer's life, interspersed with his thoughts as he counts the hours to his execution on death row. So many books and podcasts purport to focus on the victims rather than the killer, but they do so only in the context of their death. The women here are the main characters, each feeling the echoes of the women before her in her interactions with the killer. Beautifully written and haunting, especially starting with his mother. ( )

Mixed feelings.

The positives: the sections devoted to the protagonist's background and death row experience; the riveting account of Lavender's isolated marriage and escape from her abusive husband.

The negatives: the author's accounts of the majority of female characters were too wordy and often dull. ( )

How many times do I have to read about people having sour breath? Someone get this book a mint. ( )

An intriguing story of a man in the final countdown of his life and what or why he may have done to deserve the death penalty. Includes POVS from various key players of his life. ( )

Sadly, because of a brutal father, Ansel's mother ran off and left Ansel and his baby brother to be brought up in the foster system. Now, years later, Ansel is awaiting execution for the murder of several young women, Izzy, Angela, Lila, and Jenny.
This story is told in alternating voices - from the women whose lives were affected by Ansel: Lavender-his mother, Saffy-the cop who tracked him, and Hazel-the twin sister of his wife, as well as Ansel as he contemplates his last hours.
This book allows us to hear from the women who are affected by trauma and tragedy, how it changes the trajectory of their lives. The author wrote this book so that we don't focus on the serial killer, but rather on the women whose lives were cut short. Tragic, but beautifully written to honor the lives lost by monsters. ( )

Extremely engaging and well paced, Notes on an Execution was an excellent novel that delivered on all levels. In books with shifting perspectives, I often find myself enjoying one narrator more than others and feeling like I'm just pushing through parts of the book, but that wasn't the case here. Each narrative voice was a well-developed and complex character that I looked forward to following. They simply felt alive.

Also, given the themes of the book, I was impressed that it never felt preachy. I found myself deeply reflecting on the US criminal justice system, but I didn't necessarily feel I was being pushed to think one way or another. It was nuanced and gave its subject matter the gravity it deserved.

Listening to the audiobook, I also thought the performers did an admirable job bringing life to these characters. Mozhan Marno voiced Lavender, Hazel, and Saffy, and it took me until I was a ways into the book to realize it was the same narrator just because her pacing and tone for each portion felt distinct. This, coupled with Kukafka's excellent characterization, really brought the characters to life for me. ( )

Wow, I don’t know what to say about this one. The writing, the narration (on audio), the characters…. it was all so beautiful and ugly at the same time.

I feel like I don’t really know what the point of this book was, but I loved it anyhow. I loved the journey of Saffy the most. I really wanted her to be the hero, but then I learned this book isn’t about heroes and villains— it’s just about life (and death).

The only thing I didn’t love when it comes to the really great writing in this book was that this suffered from over-descriptions. So many books want to go into detail about things that honestly are just gross or TMI. The characters are all thinking about mundane things like the smell of their belly button lint or something and if people out there think about that kind of stuff— I don’t need to know about it. (No one in this book actually does that specifically, but they all have gross moments/thoughts that I didn’t need or want and were unnecessary). ( )

The chapters in the voice (excellent narration by Jim Meskimen) of the Death Row prisoner portrayed a perspective I've not previously encountered, and I found it compelling and insightful. Also, the chapters of the character Lavender, also so well narrated (Mozhan Marno) kept me interested. Some of the chapters in the other characters points of view seemed at bit long with what seemed like to me a lot of trivia. ( )

Not gonna lie, that was a difficult read. Ansel Packer is counting down the hours until his execution after some brutal murders. I found it quite unsettling that his story was narrated in second person. It made being with him during his last 12 hours an uncomfortably intimate experience as his inevitable death drew closer. The writing is sublime and the tension palpable.

“You are a fingerprint. When you open your eyes on the last day of your life, you see your own thumb. In the jaundiced prison light, the lines on the pad of your thumb look like a dried-out riverbed, like sand washed into twirling patterns by water, once there and now gone.”

Whilst we see Ansel's point of view, it is actually the women in his life that drive the story and peel back the layers of time so we can build a picture of how such a man came to be. Their voices are powerful and haunting because we as readers know how his life will unfold and the devastation he will bring. Their accounts are raw and they felt like real women, not just characters in a story. This move away from a typical serial killer novel to where the focus lies with the women made the story more absorbing in my opinion. What is equally hard hitting is that we aren't there to hate Ansel. In fact, I felt compassion for the boy left alone. “In most of your memories, your mother is gone. And before she is gone, always, she is leaving.” That mixed with the feelings of revulsion I felt for his actions made for a head and heart spinning experience. After all “No one is all bad. No one is all good. We live as equals in the murky gray between.”

Content warning: I want to give an open warning about the animal harm in this book. None of the harm is on page but there are gruesome descriptions of animal bodies. There is also domestic abuse. ( )

An amazing, beautiful, brilliant book. You should definitely read it. ( )

I'm not surprised opinions of this are very different - I can see how it might be polarizing. A very different story, but I got a little bit of These Lovely Bones vibes.

Basically, this is a book about a serial killer on death row and the women who played instrumental roles in his life. It tells how he got to be where he is, as well as their perspectives from their time and proximity with him. It is empathetic and compassionate, but not particularly sympathetic towards any of the characters. All the characters, even if I didn't particularly like or relate to them felt like real, fully-drawn women, flaws and all.

First/only book I've read by this author, but I hope it won't be the last/only. Accomplished writing. If it grabs you, it's definitely worth the read. ( )

It was solid but not remarkable. Characters were hard to connect with. Quick read for such a dark topic. I don't know-- I feel like I don't get the hype for this book compared to similar books I've read. ( )

I finished this book in 4 days - the story is very intriguing and I couldn't put it down.
Although I can't say I particularly liked any of the characters, they were all interesting and the story kept me hooked.
The writing is also very good - descriptive and vivid enough to paint clear pictures in ones mind, without being overly verbose and distracting.

I can't say I am a huge fan of the serial killer genre - but this was a captivating read and I consider it time well spent.

( )

As the novel opens, convicted serial killer Ansel Packer is awakening on the morning of his execution day, although he hopes he will not actually lose his life if the plans for escape he has made with prison guard Shawna are successful. As the novel proceeds, chapters delineating Ansel's last day hour by hour alternate with chapters telling the story of his life, each from the point of view of a woman who has played an important part in his life. These women include Lavender, Ansel's mother, Saffy, a foster child who was fostered in the same home in which Ansel was fostered, (and who grows up to become the detective obsessed with tracking down the serial killer we know Ansel to be), and Hazel, sister of Ansel's wife. This was a unique and interesting method to narrate Ansel's story.

I did have some problems with the book. There was a lot of "woo-woo" stuff about alternate universes depending on what choices were made at any particular juncture. The stories about the lives the victims might have had if they had not been murdered, for example. This just didn't seem to fit in an otherwise straight crime novel.

And SPOILERISH: Major coincidence in having the detective be a childhood friend who just happens to recognize the ring being worn by Ansel's fiancé had belonged to another foster child in the home she and Ansel were in. Worse, despite this being such a major clue, Saffy's superiors dismiss it.

But I liked the book to check another book by the same author from the library and read it.l

2 1/2 stars

First line: "You are a fingerprint."
Last line: "You'll see. It's good here. ( )